A second chance
by shygirly
Summary: carter and abby, post a simple twist of fate, more carby moments!
1. lonely tonight

This is my first fic and I don't really know how to use the computer that well.  So don't bust me for technical stuff.  I am starting off slowly because I am learning how to use fanfiction.net as I go along, so please be patient.  This story is kind of post "a simple twist of fate", but Carter and Susan never dated.

Disclaimer:  nothing is mine.

            I love being a doctor.  It is the one thing that will always be constant in my life.  Things change everyday.  Babies are born, people die, lovers get married and couples divorce.  We fall in love, we fall out of love.  I have been a teacher, a boyfriend, an addict, a lover, a grandson, and a friend.   But, consistently, I am a doctor and that will never change.  

Today, I want to escape that.  I am entering my 24th hour of work and I am tired.  We've had too many traumas today, and not enough lives saved.  Plain and simple, I'm burnt out.  I glance at my watch again, only a half an hour left.  I grab my charts and check on all my patients one last time before I walk into the lounge and fall onto the sticky leather sofa.  I'll hide out here for a while; hopefully I can avoid taking any new patients before my shift is over.  I squint my eyes a little to diffuse the harsh lights of the lounge and I lose all control.  I simply can't keep them open any longer.  I'm feeling like I'm missing something and I'm trying to figure it out.  My thoughts are over taking me and my mind is suddenly on over drive.  Visions are flashing in my head.  Bright colors of my mother, my grand mother, every patient I saw today and yesterday and all this month.  They're all turning into a blur.  I see Kerry barking out orders, Susan rolling her eyes and Abby sitting by the river with a coffee in her hands.  Abby, I have not seen her all day.  She is my missing piece.  

The door screeches open and I am pulled out of my reverie with a start.  

"Sorry Carter, I didn't know you were trying to sleep"   

Susan scurries into the lounge quickly dropping her stuff off at her locker door.

"No, its fine.  I must have dosed off, my shifts over anyway, I got to get home."  I rub my eyes a couple times.  She's looking at me weirdly, like she's trying to figure something out. Her expression is the same one that I used to get from my coworkers when I was using.  That look that says they know you're hiding something, and they're proud of themselves for figuring it out.  I give her a reassuring look that lets her know that I'm okay.  She still asks anyway.  

"You okay?  You seem kind of out of it."  

"I've been on for 24 hours, and I've got to be back here in eight hours. I'm just tired and . ."  I pause for a while and she gives me the "go ahead" look.  She wants to hear this. She thinks that I'm going to give her something juicy.  It's nothing; I'm just lonely and feeling sorry for myself for not having anybody in my life.  I move to open my locker and she watches me pack my things up to head out.  I reach the door and turn back to Susan.  She gives me the look again and I give in.  "I wish that I had somebody to go home to."   I say it simply, but she can tell that there's a strong amount of emotion and longing behind my statement.  For a second I see a look in her eyes that suggests pity.  She wipes it away quickly when she sees me notice it.  I turn to slide out the door and she stops me with a gentle tug on my arm. 

"Give her some time."   I raise my brow at her like I don't know whom she's talking about, but we both know who it is and I'm not fooling her.  I simply nod my head and walk out the door.


	2. damaged

Chapter two

I walk back into county and it feels like I just left, like I was only on a brake, but I am surprised at my mood today.  I am not upset about being here, even though I am exhausted and I didn't sleep much last night.  My coworkers are waving hello with warm and friendly smiles and I instantly feel a sense of belonging here, these people are my family, how can you feel lonesome when you've got your whole family at work with you all day long.  It's the going home part that's hard.  The walking into the front door without a "Hi honey, how was your day?" or getting into an empty and cold bed alone for the evening.   As long as I'm here, I have the world.  Maybe I'll move in.  

I walk up to the front desk to grab my first chart and I immediately feel a buzz in the air.  People are talking, I'm not sure about what, but I can hear little snippets of conversation coming from all angles.  I hear Chunys voice distantly, although I cant see her anywhere, she's saying something about a woman badly bruised. I'm not understanding why this is a piece of gossip but it seems like it is a big deal.  This is an ER, I've seen a lot worse than bruising, and quite frankly, if it's not my patient, I'm not sure that I care.  I ignore the conversations and turn to write my name on the board next to my first patient.  That's when I see it.  "Lockhart."  I freeze.  For a second I've forgotten to breath, forgotten where I am even standing.  I feel an intentional jerk coming from the left side of me and I am scooted over and out of Pratts way.  

"Shit or get off the pot man!"  

I just stair back at him blankly before my brain signals my legs to start moving.  I race down the hall to exam two and I hear Pratt behind me  "Now that's what I'm talking about!" 

I peer through the window to see Susan sitting on a bed staring at a sleeping figure.  I open the door and hesitate to walk in, and for a second I feel as if I'm being intrusive.  She turns quickly and raises her finger to her lips motioning me not to wake her.  She puts down her chart and I follow closely on her heals as she walks out of room.  She can tell that I'm concerned, worried, not even remembering to breath.  

"What happened?"   My words come out harshly and she winces at my tone.

"She's ok."   

She pauses as if she isn't going to tell me anymore, like she is actually going to follow the patient confidentiality rule right now. I give her a roll of my eyes and she gets my drift, as if Abby's not going to tell me what happened anyway.  

"Her neighbor assaulted her.  She's got a broken nose and some bad bruising around her eye.  I also did a rape kit cause she had some bruising on her upper thighs."  

I grab my face with my hands and rub my eyes. I can't believe this.  I can't even picture it.  Abby is one of the strongest people I know.  I can't believe that she was taken advantage of, hurt, abused.  How could anybody hurt someone so special? And for a second I refuse to believe this.  I need to see for myself.

I say nothing to Susan as I turn my back to her and walk into the room where Abby is asleep.  I stand in the corner for what seems like forever, watching her chest move up and down, afraid that if I move I will hurt her.  She's covered with a thin blanket and once every couple of seconds I see her body shiver.  I feel it in my own; goose bumps are sprouting up and down my arms.  Her face is turned away from me and I can't see any physical signs of abuse.  She looks like an angel.  

I sign inwardly and walk out of the room, heading for the linen closet.  I grab a couple blankets and walk back into Abbys room, approaching the bed slowly so I don't wake her up. As I move to stand over her to cover her with the extra blankets she stirs a little and turns her body so it's now facing me.  I finish tucking the blankets underneath the thin mattress and I take the first good look at her that I can.  Her nose is bandaged and her eye is deeply bruised and suddenly I am met with a fiery of anger.  I can feel my face contorting into an expression that would probably scare Abby half to death if she woke up and saw me standing over her like that.  I soften up a bit and move to pull a chair to her bedside so that I can watch her sleep.  I know that its silly, but I feel that I am protecting her, although I know that if she was awake she would tell me that she doesn't need me to do that.  

It's hours later when I stir a bit and glance at my watch with sleepy eyes.  Oh my god, I have just slept through half of my shift.    I notice that a blanket has been thrown on top of my body as my gaze diverts to the empty bed beside me.  I get out of my makeshift bed quickly and glance around the halls of the ER.  There aren't many people around; I guess that's why no one woke me up.  

I walk by the board and I see that Abbys name has been erased.  I approach Susan and she answers my question before I can even ask it

"She went home.  I guess to pack up some stuff."

"Alone?"  I ask. 

"She said she was gonna get a hotel room even though I offered her to stay on my couch"  

"Why didn't you wake me?"  I say this accusingly.  As if I'm blaming Susan for my being asleep when Abby woke up, but I feel like an ass.

"I wanted to let you get some sleep, I know you needed it."  Okay, so that's true, and I do feel a little rested, although my back is aching from sleeping in a chair. And now I'm worried about Abby being at her place alone.  

It's four o'clock in the morning and the hospital looks like a ghost town.  I take a look around me and turn back to Susan with a pleading look on my face.  

"Can you cover for me?  I want to make sure she's okay."

Susan gives me a mocking smile and I can tell she's making fun of me, as if we both don't know that Abby will be all right on her own.  She's been through so much in her life; I sometimes forget that she's one of the strongest women that I have ever known.  But I also know that sometimes she puts on a facod.  And this time could be one of those times when she needs someone and doesn't want to ask.  I give her one last look, the most pathetic one that I can conjure up.  Right now I am pulling teeth to get her to let me go.  

"Its not like I haven't just covered half your shift while you were sleeping!"

I give her my best puppy dog pout one last time.

"Oh all right."  She gives in.  "But you owe me one!"

I grab her and kiss her on the cheek.

"Thanks Susan"  

I don't know why, but as I'm walking the steps up to her apartment building, I'm feeling apprehensive.  Maybe it's because I haven't been here for a while.  I think I'm scared to see her beaten down, or maybe she might be scared for me to see her that way.  I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable or ashamed, but I have to make sure she's okay.  I reach her front door and regret knocking on it the minute I do so.  I should have called first; I'm probably startling her.  I hear her footsteps on the other side of the door and immediately feel her presence as she leans against the door to look through the peephole and see who it is.  I hear her take a step back to shuffle through all the bolts and locks and open the door for me.  

"Carter?"


	3. stay with me

Thank you for your kind reviews.  Here is chapter three.

"Carter?"

She answers the door in a dark green Pen State sweatshirt and blue jeans.  Her hair tied loosely on top of her head.  I'm surprised at her appearance because she doesn't look that bad, considering that she was just beaten up 15 hours ago.  

"Hi. I . .I"  Suddenly I am shy.  I feel like a love struck kid that has just walked up to his crush on the schoolyard.  She gives me a smile, letting me know that it's ok that I'm here.  I manage to find my words.  

"I hope I didn't wake you, I just wanted to make sure that you were okay." 

"No I actually just got home."  She speaks slowly.  "And I think I'm ok."

I nod my head and she motions at her face.

"Except for this."  She adds.  "I look hideous."  

I lean against the doorframe and shake my head at her. I move my lips to tell her no, but nothing comes out.  I'm embarrassed to tell her that she's beautiful.  I've never told her that before and I'm thinking that it might not be the best time to let her know.  I look past her into her apartment and she moves out of the doorway and motions her hands for me to follow her inside.

"Come"  She speaks lightly.

I shut the door behind me and walk towards the couch to take a seat.  I watch as Abby scurries about her apartment grabbing things and throwing them into a duffle bag.  She notices me watching her and stops to take a seat on the opposite side of the couch that I'm on.  

"I saw you sleeping next to me."  Her words come out quickly.

I look at her blankly and I'm not quite sure what to say.  I don't know why, but I feel like I've been caught because I'm not sure that I wanted her to see me there.  I feel as if she has just read my diary and learned all my secrets.  She continues, relieving me.

"You looked really peaceful, I didn't want to disturb you."

"I'm sorry I was sleeping when you woke up."  I answer her apologetically.  

"Its okay, thank you for being there."

I nod my head at her, silently communicating that I will always be there for her.

Abby quickly stands up from the couch and pads off towards her bedroom.

"I better finish packing. Brian might come home soon, he works the graveyard shift on Thursday nights."

I lean forward to rest my head in my hands.  I can't believe that bastard is still out there, hanging around, living a life as if nothing happened.

"Where are you gonna go?"  I shout from her den.  

"Motel."  She shouts back.

I get up off the couch to follow her into her room where she's collecting her clothing.  I lean against the doorframe and watch her for a good amount of time.  Right now I feel like I could just watch her forever.  She doesn't notice that I'm right behind her as she turns around and runs right into my chest.  She gasps loudly. 

"Sorry!  I'm sorry!"  I grab her around the waist and steady her, bringing my hands up to her arms.  I apologize again. 

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."  She looks into my eyes, relieved that it's just me and I swear, for a second we are sharing a moment.  I move to swipe a piece of hair out of her eyes and my touch lingers a bit longer than it should.

She looks at me worried, as if she's embarrassed that I have just seen such a vulnerable side of her.  Quickly, she wipes the serious look off her face and punches my chest playfully. 

"Don't do that!"  She says it half jokingly, and gives me what I think is a fake smile, like she's trying to hide the fact that she was scared for a minute.

She wiggles out of my grasp and announces that she should finish packing and all of the sudden a light bulb goes off in my head.  I can't let Abby stay at a motel.  I don't want her to be alone and I don't think that should be anyway.  I have plenty of room at the mansion for her to come and stay with me.  I'm shaken out of my reverie by Abbys throaty voice.

"Okay, I should go."  She stands in her doorway holding two duffle bags, one on each side of her.  I follow her out the front door and as she locks up I stop her. 

"You shouldn't go to a motel."  I blurt it out.

"Well I can't stay here, Carter."

I laugh at myself.

"No, I mean you should stay with me.  I have plenty of extra bedrooms."

She looks hard at me, thinking about what I have offered and I can tell that she feels uncomfortable accepting.

"I don't want to intrude on you."  

My hopeful grin turns into a frown and she notices my disappointment but I figure I'll try to convince her before I let her go off to a cold motel room by herself.  

"You know you won't be intruding Abby.  Come on, you can have your own bedroom, Emily can cook for you and I just bought a big screen TV.  We can have movie night!  Now can a motel offer you that?"

"Carter, I really sho . ."  She stops what she is about to say and I feel as if I can see the inside of her brain playing a tug-of-war.  It looks like the side that was pulling for her to stay with me has won.

"Okay."  She looks up at me with an unsure expression, like she doesn't know if I was just offering to be nice or if I really wanted her to accept.  I really wish she new that it was the ladder, but its not the right time to tell her.  And although I would want Abby to stay over at my house any day of the week, I have to remember that I asked her to come because she needed a place to stay and not because I want to sleep with her.  

I nod my head towards her stairs, motioning us to head out.

"Give me those."  I grab the bags out of her hands, walk them down to the jeep and open the door for her. 

She gives me a genuine "thank you" and I can tell that she's appreciative to have a friend like me.  


	4. hotel Carter

Chapter four

This one is really short because I had almost no time to write at all today, but I'll get another one up tomorrow that will be better than this one.  Thanks again for the good reviews!

We sit in a comfortable silence as I drive our way to the mansion and all I can think about is the fact that Abbys going to sleep over at my house tonight.  I feel like such a kid.  Like a fourth grader that has just asked his mommy if his girl friend can sleepover, and the only reason she said yes is because were not old enough to have any type of sexual relations yet, or even know what that is.  That's what its like tonight, a sleepover not intended to be as an "adult sleepover" should be, but I shouldn't be thinking about that now.  My friend is hurt and I just want to take care of her the best I can.  The last thing that she needs right now is to know that I have feelings for her and that I wish she was sleeping over not because someone has driven her out of her apartment.  

We walk in the front door and she takes a look around.  Her eyes widen, taking everything in; the size of this house must be overwhelming for her. I grab her hand in mine and introduce her to Emily.

"Abby this is Emily"

"Hi"  She's so cute when she's shy.  

"Hi dear.  How do you take your coffee?"  Abbys eyes widen at the question.  She looks at me as if she's asking, "is this for real?"  Sometimes I forget that not everybody has someone to bring them coffee in the morning, and immediately I feel embarrassed for being a total snob.    

"Cream, no sugar. . .  And thank you."    

We say goodnight to Emily and I walk her up the stairs, my hand resting on the small of her back.  She gives me a look and a hint of a smile, the first genuine one I have seen yet. 

"Okay, this is definitely better than a motel."

I give her a big goofy grin and I can tell that she's starting to get comfortable, which makes me happy.  

"Well I'm glad that you decided to take me up on the offer.  This house is really big and sometimes it gets . . ."

My words trail off into nothing.  

"It gets?"  She looks at me so innocently, but I turn my seriousness into a joke.

"It gets scary sometimes at night, I think we have a couple ghosts that live here."

She hits my arm playfully.

"Shut up Carter"

We walk down the long upstairs hallway and I enter one of the bedrooms to the right side, Abby a step behind me.  The room is newly decorated and huge; it's our biggest guest room in the house. Its got a king size bed with a featherbed on top of it and more fluffy pillows than you can count.   

"How's this?"  I ask half joking, I can already tell that this is more than perfect for her by the way that she's looking around.

"It'll do."  She says sarcastically.  

I walk her past the bed and drop her bags on top of it.  I enter the bathroom that connects to the room on the left wall.  It doubles as my bathroom as well, seeing as I stay in what used to be considered the other guest room.  

"This is the bathroom, it also connects to my room, so be sure to use the locks on the door."

She nods her head looking at the beautiful bathroom.  Its got two showers, one on each side and a huge Jacuzzi tub in the middle.  

"Feel free to run a bath if you'd like." 

My offer might almost sound inappropriate if she wasn't sore from being recently hurt, but I know she gets where I'm coming from.  I walk through the bathroom and open the door on the other side to let her peer in so she knows where I'm at if she needs me.

"This is my bedroom in here.  I'm going to go to sleep, but feel free to wake me if you need something."

"Thank you, really, I appreciate this."  

I walk halfway through the door and suddenly turn around to say one last thing to her.  I call her name softly.

"Abby"  She turns around.

"If you want to talk about what happened, I want to let you know that I'm here for you."  My words come out so slowly, like I think she'll understand me better if I talk that way.   

She runs her fingers over her bruises and nods her head.  I can tell that she doesn't want to talk about it yet, but that's okay because I know she will when she's ready.  

"Good night Abby"

"Good night John"


	5. the house guest

Chapter five

I wake up to the sound of an alarm buzzing and look over my shoulder to find that its eight o'clock in the morning and I forgot to turn the alarm off last night before going to sleep.  My shift doesn't start until noon today so I can still go back to sleep for a couple of hours.  

When I wake for the second time I feel alive and refreshed.  I hop out of bed and into the bathroom and I am immediately reminded of something that I had forgotten during the night.  There are girly products on my bathroom sink, Abby stayed over last night.  I take a look around to make sure that I am alone and I quickly pick up her perfume and inhale the scent deeply.    I love the way she smells, there is something about this scent that is pure Abby.  I laugh inwardly at myself when the thought of spraying it on my pillow crosses my mind.  I am a pathetic, lovesick teenager. 

I pad my way quietly down the stairs to find my guest sitting at the dining room table reading the newspaper with a cup of coffee at her side.  I watch her for a second and then make my way over to her across the room.

"Good morning" 

"Morning"  She gives me a smile and I can tell that she feels better today.

I move in front of her and kneel down to her eye level and lightly grab her face in my hands.  I look into her bruised eye and then press my index fingers lightly around her nose. 

"Scale of 1-10?"  I ask.

"I'd say about a seven."  

"Did you take some Vicodin or anything?"

"Just Tylenol."  I nod my head.  If anyone would understand why she would stay away from Vicodin, it would be me.

"How did you sleep?"

She nods her head okay with an almost shy look on her face.  She finally offers me a little bit more.

"I kept seeing him."

"What?"  I ask her gently; I'm not sure what she's saying.  She looks at me for a second and I can tell that she's reluctant to say what she really wants to.

"Last night, when I would close my eyes, he was there, just inside of my head."

I look at her for a second silently communicating that it is safe for her to keep talking if she wants to get things off of her chest.  I'm surprised that she has chosen to tell me this.  Abby has never once told me something that has made her appear so vulnerable, she must have mustered up a lot of courage to say it.  I think that she finally trusts me and even though this isn't time to think about a relationship, I'm glad that she's opening up.

When she decides that that is all she is going to offer, I realize that I should say something comforting right now and I'm not sure what that should be.

"You could have woken me up."  The minute I say this I think about what it would be like if Abby had come to me in the middle of the night.  Would she have let me hold her?

"I wouldn't want to bother you."  My warm thoughts are quickly crushed by her response.  I just hope it's not evident in any facial expressions I might be making. 

"Really, it wouldn't be a bother."  

"I'll keep that in mind."  She replies with a smile and adds, "What time are you on?" 

"Noon, but its a half shift so I'll be home around seven.  You're taking the day off right?"  I hope she says yes.  Even though she feels better today, she shouldn't be working yet.  

"Ya, I have to follow up with the investigator guy about my claim."  

"Did you want me to go with you to do that?  I can call in and tell Susan that I'll be late?"  

She shakes her head no.

"There'll be a lot of patients that need you more than I do today."

"Okay, but when you get back you need to take it easy and rest.  Take a Tylenol every four hours, okay?  And put some ice on that bruise. "  

"Yes Dr. Carter"  She gives me a roll of her eyes.

I walk over to her and stroke the back of her head lightly and rub my hand down her back while I place a gentle kiss on top of her head.  I turn to walk out the door and Abby grabs my hand bringing me back in front of her.  She looks at me for a good minute and then says something that blows me away.  

"I might take you up on that wake up offer sometime."

I'm sure she didn't mean that the way that I would like to think of it, but whatever way she meant it, I'll take.

"Anytime"  I reply, emphasizing the "any"

"I mean, if I continue to have the dreams."  I should of known that she'd clarify that for me.  She looks a little embarrassed because she probably realized how that sounded and I'm sure that she saw the spark in my eyes when her words came out.  I don't really care though, I'm not sure that I can hide my feelings any longer.  

I nod my head to let her know that I understand what she meant and I walk out the door, unable to get the picture of Abby at my bedside out of my mind.  

Its 6:30 pm, I've just finished my shift and I'm excited to get home and spend some time with Abby.  Hopefully she will be feeling all right.  Maybe we can have diner together and hopefully shell open up and talk to me about what happened.  I don't want to pressure her into talking if she doesn't want to, but there is something that I want to ask her.  

I walk in the front door and find Abby asleep on the couch.  There is an open book resting on her pelvis and a plastic bag of melted ice on her chest.  I sit down next to her and gently pull the ice off of her chest to find that it has left a wet circle on what is now a see through white t-shirt.  It appears that she is braless and I can't help but steel a tiny glance and immediately I chide myself for peeking.  She stirs a little, turning to her side and bringing her hands up to her ear to rest her head on them.  She starts to open her eyes a little.

"Hi"  I whisper.

"Hi"  She replies in a raspy and sleepy voice.

"You must be freezing, you're all wet."  I reach behind the couch to pull a blanket over her as she looks down at the puddle.  She notices that her shirt is revealing a little bit, but she doesn't seem to be embarrassed at all.  I hope its not because she thinks of me in that brotherly sense that would allow her to be naked in front of me and for her to know that its okay because I don't think of her that way, cuz that would be way off base.  

"The swelling seems to have gone down a bit."  I move a piece of hair out of her face and away from her bruise.  

"Good, so maybe I don't look like a monster anymore," her voice still coming out raspy.  

"Never did"  I reply.

I change position where I'm seated next to Abby and she notices that I'm uncomfortable, and I am a little, because I want to ask her a question and I'm not sure how she's going to respond.

"Abby, I umm . . .I want to ask you something . . . and you don't have to answer if you don't want to or if you don't want me to know, but its been bothering me and I feel like I just have to ask. . ."

"Carter"  She interjects.  "What?"

"Susan told me . . ."  I pause to take a deep breath and Abby looks at me, waiting with wide eyes. 

"Uh . . . Susan told me that she did a rape kit . . . and it's just . . it's just killing me knowing that that was a possibility . . . and you don't have to tell me what the results were if –

"No."  She interrupts me, shaking her head.

"No, you don't want to tell me?  Or, uh . . No, they didn't find any signs of . . uh"  My words trail off.  I don't even want to say the word "rape" in reference to Abby and especially not to her face.  

"No, she didn't find any signs of abuse."  I let out a breath I had been holding and Abby notices how relieved I am to hear that news.  I wish she new how much I cared about her.  I wish it were easy just to tell her.

"Good"  I guess that's the only thing I can say.  

She shakes her head in agreement.

"Ya, that's a good thing."  

"So how did your meeting go with the investigator?"  I ask.

"Well Brian made bail so I assume that he's back in his apartment, which means that I'm going to have to move, I guess."

I move to sit on the coffee table so I am right across from her and Abby sits up, letting the blanket fall from her shoulders to a puddle around her lap.

"You can stay here as long as you want."  I offer, hoping that she'll take me up on it.

"Thanks, but I cant live here forever."  I beg to differ, but I can't tell her that quite yet.

Abby gets up from the couch and starts towards the stairs.

"I'm Freezing, I'm going to take a shower."


	6. bathtub betty

Chapter six

A very short chapter, but really cute.

It's been a couple hours since I came home and Abby has been upstairs in her bedroom for most of the evening.  My guess is that she took a long shower and probably fell back asleep.  I haven't seen her eat much since yesterday and I can't find any evidence in the kitchen that suggests otherwise.  

I lazily get up from the couch, where I have been watching sports since she went upstairs, and head toward her bedroom.  I knock on the door and when I don't hear a response I open it, sticking my head in expecting to see her asleep, but she's not there.  

I turn around and walk into my bedroom to see that the bathroom door is closed, but I don't hear any running water.  She's obviously not in the shower and I wonder what she's doing.  I knock on the door lightly.

"Abby?  You okay?"  

"Ya, you can come in."  She responds and I'm not sure what to think of her invitation.  I open the door slowly as if there is something in the bathroom so delicate and I see something that I have always imagined I would, but never thought would actually happen.

She's in the bathtub; Abby is in my bathtub!  Yikes!  She's naked in my bathtub and she has just invited me into the bathroom.  I'm squirming and she can tell.  She thinks its funny and she laughs audibly at me.  I approach her slowly, not looking down into the tub, but at her face, giving her a questioning look.  A look that says "Why are you letting me in here?"

"Carter, there are bubbles."  She responds to my unasked question, lifting her arm out of the water to motion toward herself.  I sit down on the steps that lead up to the tub and finally look down at Abby and realize that I can't see anything.  I can't see her naked body because she's covered up to her neck with a huge mound of bubbles.  

"If I knew that you were going to let me in here while you bath, I would have hid the bubble bath."  

I say this jokingly, but I'm giving her a look that suggests that I want her to invite me in.  I think I'm flirting with her and its fun; I'm so sick of pretending like I don't want her.  She already knows my feelings for her, why hide them.

She laughs in response to my comment but she's probably thinking, "you wish!"

"There will always be a next time."  She says sarcastically, but I can tell she's having fun watching me squirm. 

 "Hand me that towel."  

I hand her the towel and probably should get up to leave the bathroom, but I stay seated, not sure that she's getting out quite yet.  She reaches over the tub and grabs the towel and starts to get up.  I don't get up to leave and I cant make myself either.  Its like my brain forgot to signal my legs to move.  I think to avert my eyes for a second but then I see what she's doing and I am safe right where I am. She gets up, holding the towel out, shielding my view of her, and then raps it around her body, holding the two ends of it behind her back.  

"I thought I was about to get lucky."  I blurt this out before I even think, afraid now that she might sock me.  But she just laughs. I think she enjoying the attention.

I walk back into my bedroom, leaving Abby to do her girly, nightly rituals in privacy.  I sit on the bed in a daze, replaying the events of the bathtub scene in my mind, over and over again. 

"Hey, you hungry?"  She's at my door in sweats and a t-shirt, her wet hair forming into soft waves around her shoulders.  

"For sure, I thought I was going to have to force you to eat."  

She nods her head agreeing that she hasn't had much of an appetite.  

"Well I feel much better now."  I'm glad to hear it.  


	7. three o'clock

Thanks again for your great reviews.  I love writing this story.

Chapter seven

It's nearly the end of my shift and all day long I've had my head in the clouds.  I can't stop thinking about the night I had with Abby.  Nothing happened, but there was flirting, good old fashion flirting, not to mention the fact that I almost saw her naked.  We had a late diner together and watched a little bit of television before retiring to our own bedrooms to go to sleep.   

Its Abbys first day back at work, we came in together at eight o'clock this morning.  I can tell she's having a little bit of difficulty settling back into her job.  She's really self-conscious about her bruises and I don't blame her.  People have been looking and questioning her all morning.

It's the middle of her shift and I walk into the lounge to meet her for a coffee break.  I walk in and she's waiting for me, a cup of coffee poured waiting for me as well.   I can tell that she's relieved to be with me.  I think she feels like I'm the only one not judging her or looking at her with pity.   

"How are you doing?"

"I feel like everyone is staring at me today."  She reveals to me with frustration in her voice.  I reach for her hips and steady her in front of me, stroking my hands up and down her sides. 

"Ya know what, who cares what they think.  We both know that what happened wasn't your fault.  Besides, the bruises will be gone soon and this will all be over."

"No it won't," she says this harshly, I think some of her anger is finally surfacing and she's yelling now.  

"Brian's still out there.  He's still in my apartment building; he's still inside my head.  He's still-"

"Whoa whoa whoa"  I cut her off drawing her close to me and wrapping my arms around her.  

"Shhh, its okay."  She's crying now, actually, she's somewhat hysterical.  I sway her a little in my arms trying to comfort her as her tears fall onto my lab coat.  I move my left hand to the back of her head to rest it on my chest and I lift my other hand up to her face to wipe away the tears that are falling.  She's calming down a little now, her body quivering each time she tries to catch a breath.  

Seeing as we were joking around and enjoying ourselves yesterday, I'm a little surprised at all the emotions she is dealing with today.  I thought she was dealing with this pretty well, but I guess she's been in denial because it seems that she hasn't dealt with it at all.  Not till now anyway.  Its good to see her cry, not that I want her to be upset, but I have a feeling that she bottles up all her emotions and hides them away.  I bet she never cries, not even when she's alone and if she cries about this now, she won't have to face it later on.  

"Abby," I take her face in my hands, "Maybe it was too early for you to come back to work, maybe you need a couple more days." 

"I'll be fine."  She's shutting herself off now, wiggling out of my grasp and walking to the other end of the lounge.  I'm a bit disappointed because I finally got her to open up to me and now she's closing off again.  I know that I have to be patient with her.  She's had a traumatic experience and I want to give her as much time as she needs. 

She turns around and looks at me apologetically, like she knows that she was reverting to her old ways and didn't like how it felt.  She walks back close to me and we reach for each other's hands.

"Hey, why don't you go home and lay down for a while.  I'll tell Kerry that you didn't feel well."  

She cuts me off, letting go of my hand.  "I can't go home, he's still there."

I grab her hand back and pull her in front of me and give her a smile.

"Abby, I meant to my home."

She shakes her head at me while she wipes the wet residue off of her face.

"You think I'm gonna get rid of you that quickly"  I joke with her and she smiles through her tears. 

"Thank you"  She moves to her locker to collect her things.  "What time are you off?"

"Around eight, I'll bring home some diner."

Wow, I wonder if this is what its like to be married.  I must say, it feels good to know there is someone waiting for me at home, even though she is just a houseguest and not my girlfriend.  I know she's not staying forever, but I'll take advantage of the time I get to spend with her while she's there.

Its half past eight and I've just walked in my front door.  I almost want to shout out "Hi honey, I'm home!"  But, somehow I'm not sure that it would be the most appropriate joke.  I walk up the stairs to change out of my work clothes and then through the bathroom to knock on Abbys door.  

"Come in"  

I walk through the door to find Abby sitting on her bed in a pair of shorts and a sweatshirt, her bare legs hanging over the side.  

"Hey, how was the rest of your shift?"  I sit down on the bed next to her and reply.

"Good, how are you feeling?"  

"Better.  Sorry about my little outburst."  I shake my head.

"Abby, you never have to apologize for being hurt or angry or frustrated.  Come on, diners waiting for us downstairs."

I grab her hand to pull her off the bed and head toward the kitchen.  

A couple hours later we are sitting next to each other on the couch flipping through the channels on the television.  Both of us sit facing forward, our feet resting on the coffee table.  I can tell Abby's exhausted and a bit uncomfortable so I reach to the table to grab her feet and turn her body around so she's sitting with her back against the armrest and with her feet in my lap.  I stroke up and down her legs a bit and she closes her eyes for a second and opens them again.  I start to rub her feet a little and I can tell that she's getting comfortable and even enjoying it.  She closes her eyes again; I think she's fighting to stay awake.  I flip channels and land on sports center and immediately I am engrossed in today's play by plays.  I look back at Abby a couple minutes later and she's sound asleep.  

"Abby"  I whisper, not wanting to startle her, but she doesn't respond.

"Abby"  I try one more time, but still nothing.  She's totally out of it.

I let her feet go and stand up from my position on the couch.  I move over to her side and in one swift motion, I pick her up like a baby and carry her up the stairs and into her room.  I set her down on the bed and lift her body up a bit to pull the cover out from under her and then over her body.  She stirs a bit, just as I'm about to turn her light off.

"Carter"  She calls out in the cutest, sleepiest voice, her eyes still closed.  "I'm tired"

I walk back to her to give her a kiss on her forehead and she opens her eyes.  I'm using all my restraint to not kiss her gently on her lips. 

"Good night"  I whisper to her and she closes her eyes again.  I stand there and watch her turn over and grab a pillow and bring it up to her chest hugging it.  I walk back to the door and shut the lights off.  

I turn over to look at the clock that reads three in the morning.  I have been awake ever since I got in bed three hours ago.  My mind wont shut itself off tonight.  I can't stop thinking about Abby and how much I want her, and want to be with her.  I want to hold her, and kiss her, and make love to her, and watch her sleep in my arms, and protect her, and care for her.  Just as my brain is flashing me pictures of all these things I hear a door creak and a stirring in the bathroom.  Then I hear my bathroom door creak and open very slowly.  Abby walks up to my bedside in the dark, she can't tell that my eyes are open and I can see nothing but her silhouette. I'm pretty sure that she thinks I'm sleeping.  I want to let her approach me; I think it's important that she reaches out.  I feel a dip in my bedside as she sits down next to me.  I move a little to let her know that I'm awake.  She turns around to face me and I sit up in bed, swinging my feet over the edge of it.  Without saying anything, I take her hand and stand her up, moving her to come between my legs and sit on my right knee.  I reach my right hand up to rub her back.  I don't say anything yet.  Its not like I don't know why she's here.  I'm sure she had a bad dream about Brian, or couldn't sleep.  

"I told you I might take you up on that offer."  She whispers her sleepy voice; I sense a tiny tone of embarrassment.

"I'm glad you did."  I hug her to my body and she reciprocates by resting her head on my shoulder.  She has never been this affectionate with me.  I know she wants to be comforted, and I do want to comfort her, but I really do hope that there is more feeling involved for her than just comfort.  I'm not sure where she wants to go from here.  I'm not sure what's appropriate to do now.  

I sense that she is starting to fall asleep, sitting on my lap.

"Your exhausted.  Do you want me to bring you back to your bed?"  I whisper to her.

She shakes her head no into my shoulder.

Well, now that I have made the gentleman like offer that she turned down, I guess I am going to have to make a different one.  I stand up a little bit, taking her with me.  I hold her right hand in my left hand and use my right hand to pull the covers open.  I crawl back into bed and slightly tug on her hand.

"Do you want to sleep here?"

She shakes her head yes at me and I hold up the covers to allow her to slip into bed next to me.  I let the covers fall back over us as I lay stiffly beside her.  I don't want to touch her right now because I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable.  I figure I'll let her initiate any type of physical closeness.  After being physically abused by a man a couple of days ago, I don't want to pressure her in anyway to do anything that she isn't comfortable with, although, it seems that she's the comfortable one, and I'm the one that's nervous.  She faces me on her side and I can feel her breathing beside me, it's so silent, I feel as if I could hear her heart beating.  She stirs a little in the bed and in one quick second she is lifting herself up a little bit, only to lower herself back down onto my chest.  I feel her breathing against me, her breasts pressed close to my body.  This is the best feeling in the world, I know we aren't cuddling in a sexual way, but I hope it feels good for her too.  I lift my arm up to rest my hand on her back and start to rub up and down.  I decide to try something to feel more contact with her skin, hoping that she doesn't get up and sock me.  I slowly slip my hand underneath her shirt and continue to rub her bare back.  She breaths in deeply, I think silently communicating that she's okay with our new closeness.  I can't believe what is happening, I am cuddling with Abby in my bed, touching her skin, breathing in each other so closely.  I feel her relax even more, like she might be falling asleep.  I all of the sudden feel exhausted, but I'm fighting not to fall asleep.  I want this moment to last forever, if I fall asleep, I won't be able to feel her.  I kiss her head and start to dose off; I can't help it anymore.  This will be the best nights sleep I've ever had.


	8. movie night

Your reviews were so awesome!  Thanks again.

Chapter eight

I think this one is going to be an R rating.

I've just woken up in the same position I fell asleep in.  I'm on my back, Abby resting her head on my chest, my hand still holding her against me.  I move my head to look at the clock, Its almost noon.  I turn my neck back to Abby and notice that she's awake looking at me.  I take a deep breath and stretch my chest out, her head moving up and then down as she rests on top of me.  I meet her gaze.

"Hi"  I speak quietly

"Hi"  She murmurs softly in her sleepy voice, I love that voice.

"We slept so late."

"Ummhmm"  She murmurs again in agreeance.  

"How'd you sleep?"  

"Like a baby"  She rubs her eyes, waking herself up more.

"Ya, I guess just like a baby seeing that you woke up in the middle of the night"  I joke with her and she smacks my chest lightly.  She rests her hands on my chest, one on the top of the other, her chin resting on top of her hands.  

"I meant after I came in here."  I chuckle a little.  

"Your bruises are almost gone."  I reach my hand out to brush it over her face and she gives me a smile.

"Good, so maybe no one at the hospital will look at me funny today if I cover the rest up with makeup."  

I'm surprised that she's going to work today, I thought she might take my advice and stay home a few more days.  She sees the look of surprise on my face.

"I'm fine Carter"  I look at her again with big eyes, asking her if she's sure.  She understands me without words and responds, 

"Well, you'll be there all day right?  And I'm only working a half shift"  

"Yes, I will be there all day and I'm working a half shift too, so we can ride together."  

I wonder if she only decided to work today because she knows that I will be there for her in case she doesn't feel well.

"We need to get ready to go."  I tell her this, even though I wish I could stay in bed with Abby forever.  For a second, calling in sick does cross my mind, but who's to say that she wants to stay here with me all day too.

"I'm going to take a shower."  She gets up from my chest and I immediately miss her closeness.  For a minute I feel horrible, worried that I may never be this close to her again.  What if she doesn't have another bad dream about Brian?  Will she still come to me in the middle of the night?  What if she comes anyway, even if she doesn't need comfort?  Maybe, she wants my affection; maybe she wants to be with me.  I guess I'll just have to wait and see.  I still have to let her make the first moves.  I want her to be clear about her feelings.  I don't want her to be with me only because I make her feel safe, I want her to be with me because she has feelings for me.  I know that she likes my comfort, but I wonder if she could love me?

I'm brought out of my daze to see Abby standing in my doorway with a towel wrapped around her wet body.

"You getting in, were gonna be late."

I quickly turn my body away from her, afraid that she just saw my morning visitor tenting my sheets.  What does she expect?  She's standing in my doorway half naked and wet after just getting out of my bed.  I'm just lucky that it didn't pop up when she was actually in my bed with me!

"Ya, Ya, just a sec"

She walks back into the bathroom and into her room, shutting the door behind her.  I try to think of anything but her right now to get my friend back to its original state. . . . Dr. Green . . . Dr. Weaver . . . Dr. Dave . . .Oh look, there it goes. 

It's around the middle of our shift and I spot Abby walking up towards the front desk.  She has stuck by my side most of the day; we made jokes about her being my personal nurse.  I know she feels the most comfortable around me.  No questioning looks or starring at her bruises.  The only starring she gets from me are longing gazes, and I think she likes them.  

"Your doing good"  I say to her.

"Well I have done this before"  She responds sarcastically. 

"Lets rent a movie tonight"  As I make my suggestion to Abby, I get a questioning look from Susan who is standing behind her.  

I'm pretty sure she is asking one of a couple questions.  "Abby's still staying at your house?"  or, "So you guys are spending a lot of time together?" or, "You love her, don't you!"  I choose to ignore Susan, focusing back on Abby.  

"I might make you watch something girly."  She responds to my suggestion.

"Well I might make you do something for me then"  I joke with her and she laughs easily at me, shaking her head.

Its three hours later and Abby and I are both getting off about now.  I finish changing out of my lab coat in the lounge and then head out to look for her.  Hopefully she's not stuck with a patient.  I spot her in exam 3 and wait outside, watching as she interacts with a little boy that's sitting on the bed.  She's so sweet and cute when she thinks no one is watching.  I can tell that the little boy is scared but she's comforting him and making him feel better.  She pulls a lollipop out of her scrub pocket and I see the little boys face light up.  If only we can all solve our problems with lollipops.

She walks out of the exam room and spots me waiting for her.

"Its amazing what kids will do for candy!"  She sounds proud of her smart thinking.   She grabs my hand and leads me down the hall.  "Lets get out of here."

We arrive at the video store, Abby holding my hand in hers pulling me of course to the romantic comedy section.

"How about a Bond movie?"  I suggest trying to pull her the other way.

"Too "bang bang shoot em' up. How about When Harry met Sally?"  No way I'm watching something that girly.

"Too sappy.  How about Boogie Nights?"  I anticipate her saying "too sexy."  I haven't seen it, but I heard it's pretty racy.  

"Never saw it."  She replies.

"Neither did I."

"Okay."  We say simultaneously.  

An hour later, we are huddled up on the couch in our pajamas.  I get up to pop in the movie and walk back to the couch, picking up a blanket on the way, to throw it over our cold bodies.  I reach my hand under the blanket and stroke abbys bare leg up and down trying to warm her up.  I am extra cautious about how far up her leg I let my hand travel.  After a couple of minutes, she reaches her hand under the blanket and intertwines it with mine, taking it in her lap with her.  I look at her and smile.  She looks back at me, her eyes meeting mine.  

"You've been so good to me, thank you."

"Its not hard to treat you like a princess."  I tell her, as I stoke her right cheek with my free hand and place a gentle kiss on her left cheek. "Its actually fun."

 I let her go when we both hear a couple having sex on the television.  Both of our attention is reverted back to the movie.  This movie is a lot sexier than I thought it would be and I'm slightly embarrassed that I'm sitting next to Abby watching what is basically porn.  We watch in silence.  I keep hoping that I wont get turned on by all of this.  I don't want Abby to notice that I'm uncomfortable because we're both adults and we should be able to watch this movie together without the embarrassment.  

The movie is halfway over when Abby reaches her left hand under the covers and rests it on my thigh.  We have pretty much kept a distance on the couch due to the explicit content of the movie, but she seems very comfortable now as she starts to rub her hand gently up and down my thigh.  She scoots her body closer to me, my arms reaching behind her to lean her against me.  I'm really not sure what's happening here.  Is it possible that she wants to be with me as much as I want to be with her?  We haven't talked about our new closeness yet but maybe we should.  Until a couple of days ago, I had never even hugged Abby before; I had never been physically close to her.  We have had such strong feelings for each other and been so close in other ways, you could probably say that we have had an emotional affair.  If we were going to go ahead with a relationship, the only thing left to discover would be our sexual relationship.

The movie ends and Abbys head is now resting in my lap, my hand drawing lazy circles on her stomach, her body lying stretched out on the couch.  I pick up the remote and flick the TV off, the room now pitched black.  Neither of us move to get up yet, I know that I don't want to ever get up from this position.  I lean my head down to try to look into her eyes to see if she's still awake.

"I'm awake"  She whispers as she notices my face closer to her.

"Lets go to sleep"  I suggest, hoping that she'll sleep in my bed again tonight.

"I can't move"  I pick her head up gently from my lap and move her aside so I can get up.  I reach my arms out at her to help her off the couch; she grabs my hands, but doesn't pull herself up.  I don't think she's got the energy.  I let her hands slip out of my hands, reaching under her armpits, I pick her up and bring her chest to mine as she raps her legs around my waist, my arms encircling her back holding her tightly to me, her arms around my neck.  I walk up the stairs carrying her like she's my baby.  There is something about holding her like this that makes me feel that she is so much mine.  

I pass her door and go straight into my bedroom.  Who are we kidding; I'm not sure that she'll be sleeping in her own bedroom much more.  At least that's not what I want; I want her to stay with me.  I slowly lay her on the bed, lowering the back of her head in my hand, her eyes closed, she's probably half asleep.  I let her go and she lifts her arms up and her chest out, stretching her body.  She opens her eyes and looks around the room.

"Wrong bedroom"  She whispers in her sleepy voice.

I sit down on the bed next to her, hovering over her, I stroke up and down her arm.

"Right bedroom"  I correct her in a throaty whisper.

"Right bedroom"  She repeats as she stairs back up at me.  

I get up to turn the lights off, take off my shirt and crawl into bed with Abby.  I am no longer afraid of touching her, its obvious that she doesn't mind it, in fact, I'm sure now that she wants me as close to her as possible.  I pull the sheets over us and grab her hips to pull her body closer to me.  We lye facing each other, my hand still on her side, I think I have graduated from rubbing to caressing, as I slip under her shirt to touch her bare skin.  This is the best feeling I have ever felt with a woman, holding each other and touching gently, I have to make sure she feels it too.

"Abby"  My voice comes from deep in my throat.  I'm pretty sure that was my sexy voice, even though I didn't mean to use it, I can't help it.

"Hmm?"  She replies without opening her mouth.

"Are you feeling this like I am?"

She moves even closer to me, gliding her hand over my back, moving her right leg so its in between mine, I think she's showing me that her answer is yes.  Now are bodies are entangled, our legs, our arms, we couldn't be closer.  She then shakes her head yes into my neck where it's resting.

"I want to touch you more."  I whisper into her ear.  

She moves her hand to my bare chest and runs her fingers down it causing me to shiver.  I can feel her smiling, like she's glad she's got me wanting her.  I start to move my hand out from under her shirt, down her back, over her sleep shorts and down her butt.  I glide my hand up and down her backside, to the back of her thighs and in between the back of her legs, applying slight pressure to her body.  Abby reaches her right arm out and over my hand that's touching her.  For a second I think that she's stopping me, like I have gone too far.  And now I'm worried that I have hurt her in some way.  She takes my hand and moves it from her bottom half and brings it up in between our chests.  She pauses for a second and then moves my hand underneath her t-shirt and up to her chest, gliding my hand over her breast.  I touch her so softly, not wanting to be too eager and harsh.  She lets my hand go, tracing my arm back to my body and over my back again.  I trail my hands down her stomach and over her belly button and back up to her breast.  She breathes deeply and lets out a sigh, letting me know that this feels good.  I play with the hem of her shorts, knowing that I'm not going to go there tonight, even though she probably wouldn't mind.  I feel her touching me now; her left hand is behind my head playing in my hair as her right is tracing a trail from my chest down my sides and over my butt.  I can't believe Abby is touching me this way, I cant believe I'm touching her.  Now we have hit the point of no return.  She's no longer just a friend; she has finally let me get closer.  I run my hands up her back and pull her closer to me so our bodies are touching.  I want to feel her and to get to know her tonight.  I don't want to have sex yet, and I don't want to kiss her yet.  Those things will be so special when they happen and I want to give her time to take this all in.  If it was anyone else, I would have slept with that person already, but not Abby, this is different.  We both start to get tired and settle into the bed and to each other.

"I like you here."  I whisper to her.  She's starting to fall sleep.

"In your bed or at your house?"  She replies tiredly, laughing a little.

"Well, both"  I answer her.

"I like it here too."  Her eyes start to close.

"In my bed or at my house?"  I play with her.

"In your bed."  I laugh at her response, rubbing her body from her neck to her legs,  "The house isn't bad either." She mumbles into my neck.  I roll onto my back and take her with me, laying her on top of my chest.  I stoke her hair and kiss the top of her head as we fall asleep holding each other.  


	9. little black dress

Chapter nine

This one is definitely R rated.

I wake in the morning to find that Abby is in the shower already, getting ready for work.  I turn over on my side and spot a crevice in the bathroom door.  I look through it, squinting my eyes so I can make out the shape of her body as she showers.  I lye still, watching her stretch her body under the faucet, amused by her.  All of the sudden I have a feeling that I have never lived until now.  I don't think I've ever known what love is, ever experienced it, ever felt it.  I've had several relationships, been with a descent amount of woman, but no feelings, through years of different woman have ever compared to one night of being with Abby.  

I'm lost in my thoughts when I notice that Abby has caught me gazing at her in the mirror.  I continue to look at her and she smiles at me, enjoying the attention.  I can sense that she's more comfortable with her body now that her bruises are gone.  She's got nothing to be ashamed of and nothing to hide.  I think this is the first time in a long time that she feels sexy and lusted after.  

A couple of hours later I've settled into my busy work day.  Every once in a while I find myself dodging Susan because I know that the first time she gets me alone she's going to attack me with questions about my relationship with Abby.  I haven't been discussing it with her; I guess that this is something so special, that I wanted to keep it private, at lease for a little while.  I walk into the lounge for a quick break and of course I run right into Susan.  I try to run the other way, but she catches me.

"Ah ha!  Not so fast!"

"Yes, I love Abby."  I blurt it out. I know she'd get it out of me so I give it to her and bypass her pulling my teeth out.

"Oh, I'm so happy for you guys!"  Susan is such a sap.

"Well, don't get too excited, nothings really happened yet."  I reply to her in frustration.  Although the last couple days have been heaven with Abby, I'm really itching to make it official.

"It will happen Carter, I can tell."  She gives me a wink and turns to leave.

"What do you mean?"  I shout after her, but she's already gone.  Maybe Abby has said something to Susan about her feelings for me.  

Four hours later I step out of a major trauma, exhausted and ready to go home.  I was supposed to be off an hour ago but someone forgot to tell that to the driver that hit an SUV full of children on the Kennedy.  I walk up to the front desk where I spot Abby leaning on the opposite end of the counter across the hospital.  I look down at my charts for a minute, signing out my last patients and drop the charts back onto the desk.  I look back up to find Abby gazing at me in the same spot that she was in a couple minutes ago.  

I smile at her with a questioning look on my face and mouth to her across the crowded room, "You looking at me?"

She shakes her head yes and gives me a million dollar smile that renders me breathless.  I smile back at her and motion my head towards the lounge, communicating to her to meet me in there.   I see her start to walk that way and I follow, taking the long rout around the counter.  She's waiting for me, leaning one foot on my locker when I enter the dark room.  I walk up to her, gently placing my hands on her hips as she extends her hands out to stroke my arms.  

"You ready to go?"  I ask her in a low voice.

"Well, actually, I was ready to go an hour ago."  She jokes with me as she lets my arms go and walks into my embrace.

"Let's go out tonight; I want to take you out, like on a date."

"Are you trying to wine me and dine me Dr. Carter?"  She whispers into my ear.

"No, I'm just trying to get you into bed"  I joke with her.  She laughs for a second and then looks me square in the eyes.

"It might work"  She then gives me a smile that for the first time makes me nervous about being with her.  I'm all of the sudden self conscious.  What if the big ending isn't as great as we expect?  What if our first kiss isn't perfect?  What if I can't please her? 

I walk up to Abbys door and give it a soft knock.  When she doesn't respond, I open up the door as she steps out of her walk in closet.  My mouth drops open as she approaches me.  She's wearing a tight low cut, spaghetti strap black dress and high heels, her soft waves pushed off her face and tied together messily at the back of her head.  She's wearing some make up, which I have only once seen her wear before.  She looks sultry and womanly and irresistible.  She walks past me, stopping to push my lower jaw back up to its original position.  She gives me a mischievous smile and then grabs my hand to lead me out of her bedroom.  

On the ride back from diner we sit in a comfortable silence in the back seat of the town car.  I can't stop thinking about tonight and how perfect our date was and how perfect the rest of our evening might turn out.  I'm getting a little nervous and I'm afraid that it shows.

"Your quiet all of the sudden"  I hope she doesn't think that I didn't have a great time.

"I'm just thinking"  I say this grabbing her hand trying to reassure her. "About what?"  She asks quietly, caulking her head.

"You . . . and me"  It took me a while to get it out.

"Good things?"  She brings my hand up to her mouth and places gentle kisses in my palm then she laces her fingers with mine and drops our hands in her lap.  

"Wonderful things"  I whisper in her ear and kiss her hair line.

We walk into the house and I escort her up the stairs and to her bedroom door as if I'm dropping her off at her own house.  We laugh at this, realizing how funny it is for me to drop her off in the room next door.  

"Thank you for taking me out."  She whispers to me, playing with the buttons of my shirt as I stroke her up and down her sides.

"Well, I just wanted to see you in this little black dress so . . ."    She laughs at my joke and gives me another one of those smiles, and then it's all over for me.  I can't wait any longer; I need to have her now.  I trail my hand slowly from her waist up her back and to her neck.  I rub the back of her head at her hair line and start to lower my head to meet hers.  She rests her palm on my chest and grabs my shirt, pulling me slowly closer to her.  I place kisses on her collar bone and up her neck.  I make my way up her jaw line and close to the side of her mouth, not going there quite yet.   I hear her sigh in frustration as she turns her head a little, asking for me to kiss her already and I oblige.  Our lips meet for the first time in the softest most delicate kiss I have ever shared with a woman.  I kiss her slowly, relishing every second that I'm touching her.  She starts to back away from me and I almost panic that she is going to end our evening right now, but I then realize that she's taking me with her, pushing the door to her bedroom open.  We stay connected, my tongue invading her mouth as she pushes me backwards towards her bed.  I feel the bed at the back of my legs and Abby pushes me slightly so I'm sitting down on the edge of it.  I pull her so she is standing inside my legs, her hands coming up to my face holding me as I kiss her and bite on her bottom lip.  I move my hands down her body to the back of her legs.  I stroke up her thighs and underneath her dress and for the first time I feel the softness of her bare ass.  I knead her a little and move up to pull down on her g-string.  I move my hands back down her butt and take her underwear with me.  They hit the floor and she steps out of them, still wearing her heals and never pulling apart from our kiss.  My hands move back onto her body as she unbuttons my shirt and slips my arms out of it.  I start to kiss down her neck, making my way to her breasts, my hands underneath her dress, bringing it up over her head.   She discards the dress onto the floor so I can continue feeling her.  I stop kissing her for a second and lean back a little bit so I can see all of her.

"What?"  Uh oh, I think I might be scaring her into thinking that I'm chickening out.  I pause for another minute and I can tell that she's worried, but I have to stare at her a little bit longer.  

"Your beautiful"  She smiles at me, halfway embarrassed and moves her hands to cover herself.  I grab one of her hands before she could set it on her body.

"No, don't."  I entwine her hand with mine so she can't hide behind it.  She steps closer to me and lays a hand on my shoulders, as the other one rubs down my chest and over my nipple.  Then my hands encircle her waist as I pull her in for a fierce kiss.  There is so much passion here, I think I might explode.  She lowers her hands to my belt and starts working to release me from my prison.  I lift my butt from the bed to allow her to slip my pants down and off my body, taking my boxer briefs with her in one swift motion.  I move to get up so I can lower her to the bed, but she pushes me back and crawls on top of me.  She rubs her naked body against mine and I moan loudly, unable to control myself any longer.  She has completely taken control over me as I writhe beneath her.  She trails kisses down my chest and back up it, teasing me because I thought that she would continue on her journey downward.  Okay, so maybe I have to beg.

"Abby"  I moan and squeeze her shoulder.  She takes a minute from her assault on my chest and looks up at me, her hand reaching lower and lower.  She looks me in the eye and drops her head down to kiss me passionately as she finally takes me in her hand.  I enter into a daze.  There is so much pleasure here, I can barely stay present for it.  I almost black out, trying to prolong the inevitable and a couple minutes later I am on top of her and inside of her, moving slowly and lovingly and gently.  This is the best feeling I have ever felt in my life, really, my whole life, this is the best moment of it so far.  Not only because I am having mind blowing sex, but because I am having it with Abby, who I am so incredibly in love with.   

"Carter"  She calls out my name in a moan and I can barely hear it.  

"John"  She's trying to get my attention, "I'm not gonna break"  She whispers in my ear.  Okay, so maybe I am being too delicate with her.  

I quicken my pace and within a couple of minutes we are lying side by side, satisfied and spent.  

A couple of minutes pass and I find myself staring at her, not being able to take my eyes off of her.  I move my hand over to her and trace lazy circles on her stomach as I place small butterfly kisses up and down her neck.  She smiles underneath me and laughs as my touch becomes ticklish on her stomach.  We smile at each other, both of us giddy after our lovemaking.

"What are you thinking?"  She asks me with a smile on her face.

"I'm thinking like ten different things right now, actually."  I want to tell her everything that I feel but I don't want her to think I'm nuts and scare her off.

"Let's hear it."  She laughs, like she's expecting to be entertained by my thoughts.

"Well I don't know if you're ready for this."

"Spill it Carter"  She gives me that look that I can't resist and I have to give her what she wants.  I actually think that I'll never be able to say no to this woman, I want to please her every chance I get in every way possible.

"Okay, well . . .  My first thought was that . . . that that was the best sex I've ever had.  My second thought was that I hope you enjoyed it at least half as much as I did.  My next thought was that I should be calling it "making love" because it's so much more than just sex when you're doing it with someone you love.  I then started thinking that I hope you're on the pill because we didn't use protection.  My next thought was, okay, so if you're not on the pill, we'll start a family early and . . . I hope it's a girl . . .actually twins, really is what I would like, two girls."

I stop mumbling as Abby starts laughing at me, but soon I'm laughing with her and tickling her under the covers.  She settles down with a serious look on her face, taking my cheeks in her hands and kissing me softly.

"I love you too."  She whispers it in my ear as if it's a secret.  Wow, she loves me too.  I must look like the biggest idiot right now because I don't think I have ever smiled so big in my life.

"So, you don't think I'm nuts?"

"No,"  She flashes me a mischievous grin "but I do think that you're sexy"  She kisses up my chest until our lips meet again and soon I'm on top of her pulling her under the covers for an encore.


End file.
